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:iconblushingnarcissism:

~blushingnarcissism

i am octopus
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About Me Member Lurker blushingnarcissismUnited States Recent Activity Deviant for 5 Years
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Act One

Newest

oops?i feel like i am coming apart  i have a need to solidify myself  
by a prominent showing of interest   
i am meat on display  pick one and  devour  raw,  wet  and bloody.  it makes a sound.  like sloshing pudding around in your mouth.  noise only you can hear.  like voices in your head.  my breathing is an alien sound.  in through my lungs  out through your mouth.  something like the fact that every secret  that you've ever had  is washed from your body in piss.  when left unattended  my nerve endings want to explore your nerve endings &nb oops?
by ~blushingnarcissism
step by stepA Guide To Self Destruction Through Starvation  As Practiced By The Writer   
Numer One: Depression is good. Emotionally shutting yourself down...even better.  
Number Two: If you don't already, learn to like coffee. It surpresses the apetite.  Number Three: Stock up on Nighttime meds. Asprins and Nyquil make for good excuses. You can't feel hungry if you aren't awake. Plus, you are going to get a lot of headaches  Number Four: Rice and broth of beans. It's okay. That's what certain monks eat while fasting.  Number Five: Keep bottle water by your bedside. You will be needing it.  Number Six: If you feel step by step
by ~blushingnarcissism
do you?it is only fun for the first---my muscles are weaker  i hate the sticky caress of glossy photopaper  like the vaneer of wet of nail polish  fumbling through too many layers of clothes  fumbling around for that smell of perfume and cigarettes and softer skin  making my hands curl around the lighter  my body does not wish to embrace anything that isn't attached to you  i'm cutting my milk teeth on your swelling of breast  i nursed myself for weeks  growing stronger, breathing harder, with only your embrace to fall from  candles are lit  a-lighting all of your beauty with shadows  guard do you?
by ~blushingnarcissism
something so badlythat must be the worst part about it all.  what i want from her.  i want her to hate me.  but she couldn't do it. she couldn't do it even if she tried.  and in the end.  all it would do is serve the purspose of making me feel better.  still, i am just so selfish.   
she still speaks to me like nothing happened.  like i was never running blind.  like i never hurt her.  like i never found out.  like i never made her cry.   
i thought something would change  something.  anything.  i expected it even.  but nothing happened.  everything moves the same sp something so badly
by ~blushingnarcissism
Browse Gallery

golf clubs

Devious Journal Entry

Sat Mar 31, 2007, 2:45 PM
rebel! rebel!

well..i finally got a moment. it actually let me log in.
on the first try.
it usually takes about several.

what have i been up to?
trying to get the fuck out of raleigh
make kyo-kun answer the phone
we need to cordinate the move to baltimore.
damnit.
i broke a window.
i broke into a church.
i peeked in their fridge.
i punched a guy in the face.
twice.
he made me defend my family
he also made me bleed.

oooh...i also got
guilty gear xx
gitaroo man
shin megami tensai devil summoner
killer7 (it was sitting in the pawn shop for nearly a year)
trapt
dance factory
alien hominid


i need salvation!

oh, i had a seasonal job, but i had to give it up. i worked twenty hours my second day and i got under paid with both my pay checks. now i applied for a job at the sister company. ugh. quick fuck. i mean, buck.

oh yea, my mother totally fucked me over.
she threw out all of my stuff
tore up the carpet
threw out my bed
made me disappear
but it turns out my dad left money for me that no one ever found.
hah!
i found it.
bitches.

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Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Eek! Cali-for-ni-a. the 'for' stands for fornication
  • Interests: the involuntary reaction of drowning and the ego balance of gender
  • Favourite band or musician: i think i get a new one every other hour
  • Favourite genre of music: it's japanese..for the most part
  • Favourite artist: the hard little question stabs at my soft little brain cells!
  • Favourite poet or writer: Ryu Murakami and you'll know i love you when i try to corrupt you with his books
  • Favourite photographer: My Dad

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~phoenixtx:iconphoenixtx: May 29, 2007, 9:49:32 PM
hi!

how are you doing?

...and why doesn't your journal show up in my messages? this saddens me.

--
found religion inside myself
i drank the blood, the flesh was stale
~phoenixtx:iconphoenixtx: Apr 17, 2007, 12:13:59 AM
:heart:

--
found religion inside myself
i drank the blood, the flesh was stale
=xdragonflyx:iconxdragonflyx: Jul 21, 2006, 9:24:27 AM
Cuttlefish is love.

--
.: Dragonflychaser
~DontNeedThis:iconDontNeedThis: May 21, 2006, 7:03:23 PM
Vhat is new my dear"?

--
love, holly ann
~nahari:iconnahari: Apr 15, 2006, 3:59:06 PM
:glomp: thank you for the fav :33

--
A note of silence
~cumin-seed:iconcumin-seed: Apr 14, 2006, 10:38:14 AM
Thank you for the fav! Interesting work you have!
~InvaderNny:iconInvaderNny: Apr 14, 2006, 9:48:05 AM
Hi! Thank you very much for the fav :aww:

--
Me likes tea :)

98% of the teenage population does or has tried smoking pot. If you're one of the 2% who hasn't, copy & paste this in your signature.

Dear Die-ary..... I seem to be dead - JTHM
~TrueFox:iconTrueFox: Apr 14, 2006, 9:47:33 AM
Danke ;) Nice stuff btw.

--
Dean
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